I am sad and anxious by this situation
The pill greatly reduces my sex drive.To the point where I no longer ever masturbate. I don’t really initiate sex (because even if I want to do so, I’m discouraged that my body just doesn’t respond much). I am 21!
Of course my boyfriend has noticed a big change, since I was often initiating sex before, often horny. Now he feels undesired. Not that I don’t have sex with him anymore, I do. But I guess he is disappointed that I am not that "wild thing" I was before.
The thing is, I would love to stop taking the pill, but I am taking it as treatment. Starting about 2 years ago I began having tremendous pain at the start of my period (not necessarily every period, irregularly like every 2, 3 or 4 months). And I mean incapacitating pain, with no warning, that I end up on the floor… it is hard to explain. The pain is unimaginable and I probably look like the exorcist when it is happening to me. Also I get irritable bowel at the same time. It’s just not something I can have while leading a normal life. Also, it is very scary to me, and I have taken the ambulance due to it before.
They prescribed me codeine, which really does not help whatsoever.
Well apparently this is caused by ovarian cysts, and the pill is the only treatment to shrink and or prevent these and so far it has done that!
So I am too scared to stop the pill. Maybe after a couple of years like 2-3 years, I will see if things have changed.
But everytime my boyfriend talks about how we don’t have sex as much as before, I want to cry. I am so sad I am not as satisfying to him as I was before. Of course I don’t neglect him, but I guess he can’t help but be hurt that I am not jumping on him like I did before, or that I can’t orgasm as easily so I don’t all the time anymore (the pill causes that too).
He kind of understands and doesn’t really give me grief about it, but I am just so sad and don’t know what to do. I am also bothered by not having as much desire myself, kind of sucks at this age.
What would you do in my situation.
Well, you could see a doctor and tell him about the lack of sex drive. There may be a way he can help with that.
Otherwise, your personal health comes before your boyfriend’s need for sex. Obviously.
You just need to sit him down and tell him that you’re sorry, but there’s nothing you can do about it. Its not his fault, but you have to take it to stay healthy. Ovarian cysts, if left unchecked, could lead to cancer, and neither of you wants to deal with that. So he’ll just have to get over it, or get creative. Tantric sex is good in this kind of situation.
Your other option is that every once and a while you might want to fake it, a lay back and think of england kind of deal. It will make him feel less insecure, and it wouldn’t kill you to do it once in a while even if you weren’t in the mood. Unless it hurts you, in which case forget about it. You could always give him a handy or oral too, once in a while. Little effort by you, and no penetration, but considered an actual and awesome sex act by most men.